Kyle’s NFL Week 6 review

So, a few headlines before I recap week 6…….

Matt Flynn signs with Buffalo

Really?? Your solution to your back up QB job is Matt Flynn? Man, Buffalo’s QB situation is a mess with Manuel sidelined, but Matt Flynn?? From what he looked like this year I’d expect better production from a paraplegic 5 year old.

Packers top WR Randall Cobb out up to 6-8 weeks

Randall Cobb fractured a fibula in Sunday’s win against the Ravens. Cobb is the leading receiver for the Packers, and I wish I could say I feel bad from them, but hell no. Aaron Rodgers is one of the best QB’s in the NFL, and even without Cobb and James Jones (also left with a knee injury) the Packers still took care of the Ravens. Let’s see how the Packers respond with a couple of their key players out. Jones has said he expects to play Sunday against Cleveland. Something tells me they will be ok this week.

A note from me…..

Ok, so it was a horrible, horrible tragedy that occurred this week resulting in the death of Tyrese Robert Doohen. Who’s that you ask? That is the 2 year old son of running back Adrian Peterson. Now, I do understand it is a horrible tragedy, but I wish the national, as well as social media would just slow the fuck down for a minute. Now, please understand that by saying what I’m about to say does NOT make me cold hearted, or an asshole. I can only imagine the pain of losing a child, and I’m not trying to undermine that. What I AM saying, is look at this situation. Everyone and their mother are posting pics with Adrian and his son on the field, all loving, asking for prayers, etc. OK, YOU FUCKING IDIOTS. That wasn’t the son that was killed! Adrian Peterson only recently found out of about his son, and met him for the first time in the hospital when he found out about the tragedy. Granted, as soon as Peterson found out about him he stepped up, offered child support, etc. and I commend him for that, but the way the media has blown this up is ridiculous. Get off it you bloodthirsty vultures. Whatever gets your site more hits, right?? Douchebags. Even Adrian Peterson himself asked people to stop posting pictures and such. Oh, and one final thought….. to the guy who complained that the death of this boy was going to affect his fantasy stats with starting Peterson for week 6… YOU sir, are a fucking loser. You are obviously a lonely fan boy sitting alone in your studio apartment eating fruit loops for dinner and masturbating to anime porn. You are the biggest pile for even thinking of fantasy football during a time like that, and I hope you lose every game from here on out because that is the least of what you deserve. You sir, earn my “Yeah, I’m a Piece of Shit” award this week.

And now, WEEK 6

New York Giants – 21 Chicago – 27

Ah, Eli Manning. You reminded everyone how much you suck right off the bat on Thursday. Manning threw 2 picks in his first 5 attempts, one of which Tim Jennings took to the house, and looked off pretty much all night. The Giants came right back on the legs of Brandon Jacobs (22 car. 106 yds 2 TD) scoring on a 4 yard TD, his first of two on the night. Jacobs reminded everyone that for at least this week, he’s not too fat and slow to still be playing. Jay Cutler heard Brandon Marshall’s complaints and struck back with a 10 yard TD pass, his first of 2 to Marshall, who finished with 9 catches for 87 yards and two scores. Cutler had a nice game again, finishing 24/36 for 262 yards and 2 TD’s. The best part of his stat line? ZERO int’s. The Bears controlled this game, but the Giants seemed to stick around, and were within one score through the whole 4^th quarter, but Manning threw his 3^rd interception with just over a minute to play, as Tim Jennings sealed the win for the Bears.

Now you got the recap, my personal thoughts on this game…

The Bears defense is in some serious trouble. D.J. Williams is lost for the season, and even though I think Bostic will do ok, the lack of pass rush is seriously concerning. The Bears only have 8 sacks through 6 games. That is completely pathetic. Corey Wootton is doing all he can, but Peppers and McClellin have been non-factors. I don’t know what they can do to fix it, but they need to figure it out, and quick. The Bears will beat the teams they are supposed to beat, but when you can’t pressure the QB against players like Rodgers, Manning, Brady, etc. they will tear up the defense. We all saw what Brees did against them.
With the exception of the Lions game, Cutler has been playing his ass off. 5 of the 6 games this year have produced a QB rating over 90, and he is now on pace to have twice as many TD’s as INT’s. I wouldn’t be surprised if Emery and Bus Cook have been in contact working out the parameters for a new contract already.
I know Brandon Marshall came off as a whiny baby all week, but give the guy some credit, he is a beast. He’s the best receiver the Bears have had since I can remember, and all he wants is to win. He changes games, makes big plays, and creates mismatches for Jeffrey and Bennett all day long. I’m not getting sick of his antics, and no one in Chicago should be hitting the panic button with his complaints. He’ll be fine, and Cutler will make sure if that.
Lance Briggs is playing like a man possessed this year. I know he had the bonehead penalty against the Saints, but other than that he looks to be in every bit of pro bowl form that the fan base has grown accustomed to. Hopefully he can mentor Jon Bostic a little as the season goes. Bostic will make his mistakes, and he WILL have growing pains. He was drafted to be Urlacher’s replacement, not to be Urlacher himself. Everyone needs to remember that and give this kid some time. Don’t load his shoulders too quickly because he can become a player.
The run defense worries me with the Bears. The pass rush already sucks, which puts extra pressure on the defensive backs, and when QB’s have all day to throw, someone WILL get open. The run defense, however, just allowed tubby bitch Brandon Jacobs to break a hundo on them. He was on the street 3 weeks ago. Mel Tucker needs to light a fire, and the Bears need to play tougher on the line. I know they’re down 2 key players, but step up or shut up, and prove you belong on an NFL roster. Talking to you Stephen Paea, Larry Cohen, David Bass, and Shea McClellin.

Final Bears thought…

The Bears won. Rah rah hooray hooray, who cares, they won poorly. How many weeks can we be happy that they are just squeaking by? Reminds me of the 2001 13-3 year with Dick Jauron at the helm. How they let the Giants hang around and almost drive for the game winning score is beyond me. This defense needs a wake-up call. I thought New Orleans and Detroit did that for them, but as it turns out they’re just bad. For a city that prides itself on defense, Mel Tucker needs to live up to some history and expectation. The offense looked so-so again, but there are areas that are being improved and it can be seen week to week. Here’s hoping the defense can catch up and show some flashes of what they used to be.

AROUND THE NFL

Cincinnati - 27 Buffalo – 24 (OT)

Well, yet another game that proves I can’t predict how unknown quarterbacks will play for shit. Thad Lewis lost a fumble that turned into a Cincinnati TD, but he had a halfway decent performance in only his second career start. Someone must have kicked Andy Dalton in the nuts this week as he threw for 300+ and 3 scores. The Bengals moved to 4-2 and sole possession of first place with the Ravens and Browns losing. Man, it’s weird to say that sentence with the word “Browns” included in it.

Detroit – 31 Cleveland - 17

Screw you Brandon Weeden. You have become my new Christian Ponder. Since he’s benched for what should amount to the rest of his career, I have now put you in his place. I actually want to see the Browns become a contender again, and that won’t happen with Weeden throwing passes. Especially passes like that craptastic throw to seal the loss.

Oakland – 7 Kansas City - 24

Kansas City is now the loudest stadium and Guiness verified it. Big fuckin whoop! Who really gives a shit, it still sounds louder in Seattle. This game was actually close for a better part of three quarters. The Raiders definitely played KC tough at Arrowhead, they just didn’t have enough on offense to come back once KC started scoring. Terrelle Pryor threw a pick 6 that iced the game for KC. Pryor had a learning curve game, throwing 3 picks. He eventually might be what the Raiders need, unfortunately Dennis Allen and Reggie McKenzie need someone right away in order to save their jobs in the fire-happy Raiders organization.

Carolina – 35 Minnesota - 10

I don’t get Carolina. I swear they’re like Jessica Alba. When Carolina wins, they win big. AKA Jessica Alba of a few years ago. When they lose, they look like shit. AKA Jessica Alba now that she has herpes thanks to Derek Jeter. I bet Ron Rivera’s ass is going to be really callused after burning it on the hot seat, letting it cool down, burning it again, letting it cool down…….I thought Minnesota would show up a little more than this. Josh Freeman get ready….

Pittsburgh – 19 New York Jets - 6

I saw a few parts of this game, and to be honest, it was one of the most boring games of the year. Geno fell back down to the rookie plateau he should be on, the running games for both teams were non-existent, Big Ben had a decent day, and there were a lot of field goals. Trust me, you didn’t miss much.

Philadelphia – 31 Tampa Bay - 20

Nick Foles filled in admirably for Mike Vick. If Vick doesn’t return next week, let’s see if Foles can do it against a team as good as Dallas, and not the Pop Warner Buccaneers. Shady McCoy had a good day running the ball and the Eagles crawled back to .500 as they handed the Bucs yet another loss in this garbage heap of a season. Greg Schiano can you feel your seat getting warm? How bad do things look in Tampa? Not only have they not won a game yet, but their entire organization looks in disarray. On top of all that now it looks as if they have a facility that’s as dirty as Tommy Lee’s underwear drawer. Three staph infections so far this year when the rest of the league combined has none? Dirty fuckers.

Green Bay – 19 Baltimore – 17

I think the Packers might be calling Donald Driver to come out of retirement soon. Holy crap. Any team that does NOT have Aaron Rodgers is in real trouble when 2 of their top 3 wideouts go down and you have to finish the game with only 2 healthy receivers on the roster. Fuck you, Mr. Rodgers. I hate how good you are. The Ravens almost pulled this out, but after containing the Packers most of the day, the defense looked too tired to get a stop late in the game. Flacco rebounded in this game despite getting sacked 5 times, but 2-14 on 3^rd down won’t be winning you any games anytime soon.

St. Louis – 38 Houston – 13

Now I’m no fan of Matt Schaub, but it’s pretty classless for fans to boo their home team QB, shitty or not, for getting injured. As much as I giggled when I saw TJ Yates playing, I didn’t think Schaub deserved that. Oh, and Yates threw a pick 6, so now that’s 5 weeks in a row throwing a pick 6 for Texans’ QB’s. Hahahahaha. St. Louis looked a lot tougher this week, so let’s see if they can avoid crapping down their leg next week and string a few together.

“OK, we won a game yesterday. If we win today, it’s called “two in a row”. And if we win again tomorrow, it’s called a “winning streak”… It has happened before.” —— Lou Brown

Jacksonville – 19 Denver - 35

I think it’s great the in a 35-19 game we can say that it was in ways a victory for the losing team and a sub-par game for the winning team. Peyton had 3 turnovers (1 INT 2 FUM) and the Jaguars were in this game up until the early 4th quarter. They beat the spread, which is a victory in itself, and the defense actually looked pretty good. Pretty good for the Jags is only allowing 35 points to a rock star Denver team. Hahahaha. The fact that for 3 quarters Denver never really had a sense of controlling this game is a moral victory for Jacksonville. I still can’t pick them to win anytime soon, but this week we can say they didn’t suck nearly as much as I anticipated.

Tennessee – 13 Seattle - 20

Pete Carroll, you’re a fucking idiot. This game wasn’t as close as the score dictated. Seattle seemed to be dominating this game, even if the score board didn’t show it. But enough of that, back to that gum-chomping, lesbian look-a-like douche. Steven Hauschka got taken out in the first half from a jarring hit by Darius Raynaud so, with his kicker getting evaluated for a concussion, Pete Carroll lined up Jon Ryan for a field goal in the second quarter. Not a problem, right? He’s a punter, they kick balls, it was a short field goal, not a biggie. Well, a reserve safety was the holder, since Ryan usually holds, and bumbled the snap leading to a desperate attempt to throw the ball instead. Well that led to a fumble that Jason McCourty ran back 77 yards for TD.

Had Tennessee not been hopeless with Ryan Fitzpatrick at QB that could have been a game changer.

New Orleans – 27 New England – 30

After getting knocked out with yet another injury, I’m starting to think Danny Amendola needs to be wrapped in bubble wrap before each game. Man, what a china doll. That “letting Wes Welker go because we have another Wes Welker in Amendola” thing isn’t working out so great is it?? Breaking News: Wes Welker still reeeeaaaallllly likes his new digs. I will say this, though. When all seemed dead for the Pats, and the Saints just needed to close the door, Brady threw his foot in the way and said, “Just a minute, bitches!” Brady engineered a 70 yard drive with just over a minute to play and struck one of his unknowns in Kenbrell Thompkins with :05 left for the game winning score. I may not like Belichick or Brady all that much, but I give credit where credit is due. It was a hell of a finish.

Danny Amendola injury history:

2011 – elbow – misses 15 games

2012 - ankle, shoulder, foot – misses 5 games

2013 – groin – misses 4 games

And now he has this head injury. Seems like a shaky investment to me….

Arizona – 20 San Francisco - 32

Oh, man! I was confident in my upset pick this week until the 4^th quarter. The Cardinals defense played fairly well, but a couple early Palmer interceptions really put the Cards in a hole. I really like Bruce Arians, so I hope he can get things right in the desert. Kaepernick started trending upward for the first time since week 1, so let’s see if he can sustain it. I’m guessing he had a hard time concentrating in weekly meetings with his wang down Harbaugh’s throat.

Washington at Dallas

Tony Romo wasn’t spectacular, but he didn’t need to be. Dwayne Harris had a career day (more on that below) and picked up yards where the ground and air attack lacked. The defense held RG3 and shut down Washington to even up their record at 3-3. Washington looks lost, but at least RG3 looked like the bye week helped him. He looked to have more pep in step, even if the team looks to be limping along. The Redskins face a shaky Bears defense next week, which could be a good confidence builder if they can win that game and get their season turned around.

Indianapolis at San Diego

San Diego held Andrew Luck and the Indy offense without a touchdown as they took down the Colts 19-9 on Monday night. Luck looked mainly ineffective but didn’t get any help from his receivers who dropped 4 passes, one of which could very well have gone for a TD. Phillip Rivers decided to come to play, and left his tampon at home. The Chargers are one of those hair-pulling teams where you never know what you’re going to get week-to-week.

“Well You Didn’t Make a Lick of Difference” Performance of the Week:

Ryan Fitzpatrick – QB – Tennessee Titans

17/29, 171 yds, 0 TD, 2 Int

I understand Fitzpatrick was playing the Seattle defense on the road, but the game was within reach all day. Fitzpatrick did nothing to help his team get into a position to win, or even tie the game. When you’re the back up QB in a hostile environment, and you’re not that good to begin with, challenging the other team’s top corner who happens to be one of the best in the league isn’t the wisest idea.

“Holy Crap, I’m Awesome!???” Breakout Performance of the week:

Dwayne Harris – WR – Dallas Cowboys

222 total return yards

86 yard punt return for a TD

90 yard kickoff return

The 3^rd year receiver had a game returning kicks after only having 6 receptions on the YEAR. He broke a punt return 86 yards for a TD that opened up a two score lead in the first half, and ran a kick back 90 yards that set up a TD pass from Romo to Terrance Williams. The Cowboys needed the contribution on a day that Demarco Murray went down with an injury and Romo wasn’t lighting the world on fire. He definitely made the best of his touches Sunday night.