|
By: Baby Z
We haven’t had any new Glee episodes since the Cory Monteith tribute on October 10th, due to the World Series, so I’ve been pretty pumped for this week’s new episode. Although, truth be told, a little less so when I discovered the show’s musical “focus” would be Katy Perry vs. Lady Gaga. First off, I don’t really care for either artist… it’s not that I necessarily can’t stand one or the other, I really just don’t listen to either’s music.
So, to start the season with 2 episodes dedicated to The Beatles and then the Cory Monteith tribute, I was a little deflated upon finding out about the Perry/Gaga thing.
I am also pretty indifferent about Adam Lambert. I don’t listen to his music, I think he should have won his season on American Idol, and his version of Mad World was un-freaking-believable, but I’m not really a FAN so to speak. Taking this into consideration, I was pleasantly surprised with his addition to the show. There’s no doubt the man brings the entertainment factor to each of his musical performances, and his debut on this week’s Glee was most definitely no exception.
The episode begins with Mr. Schue announcing who the Glee Club’s competition is at Nationals and no one is all that invested until he says “Throat Explosion” because apparently that particular Club is some untouchable super group that only admits students who log 10,000 hours of show choir rehearsal first. From a brief camera swap, we’re shown a brief clip of a performance by “Throat Explosion” and, no doubt, it appears as though they bring the WOW factor to their performances, kind of like little Lady Gagas.
It’s discussed that without last year’s Glee “Gagas” like Kurt and Rachel, they’re really just a bunch of Katy Perry’s, which sparks a debate on who thinks they’re more “Gaga” and who thinks they’re more “Perry” and so Mr. Schue assigns them to battle it out, Gaga vs. Katy Perry style, only he wants the Gaga’s to perform Katy Perry and vise versa.
Meanwhile, Sam (who couldn’t BE any less Gaga) asks the school nurse out, who I admit, I hate so much I don’t even remember her name, and she gives him some crap about how “hardcore” she is going to see Skrillex and Nine Inch Nails and shit. Um, OK - I want her to go to see a Ghost performance and then come back to me talking about hardcore. She turns Sam down and goes away.
Hate:
Over in New York where Kurt has enlisted Santana & Demi Lovato (who I love together)………
….into a newly formed “band” of which they cannot agree on a name yet (Santana suggested The Apocalipstics which - hilarious) they hold tryouts for another singer (I guess Kurt, Santana, and Demi aren’t enough singers?) and who is the ONLY person to show up to audition? Starchild - aka Adam Lambert, who’s in full steampunk attire:
He performs “Marry the Night” which, I guess, is a Lady Gaga song? His performance basically rocks the socks off of Santana, Demi and to be honest, me - - and included swinging from a chandelier at one point and dry humping the floor at another. However, Kurt is all “Oh hell naw” about Starchild, and even completely flips the script on the very essence of who Kurt has been for the entirety of the show telling Lambert that perhaps were he to tone down his look he might be a better fit.
Back at McKinley, “new” Santana Cheerio and Sue Sylvester have a pretty hilarious conversation about the Gaga-Perry thing going on with the Glee Club, and “new” Santana explains that she’s dressed in only caution tape:
…..because she plans on taking some of Puck’s (less attractive) brother Jake’s attention away from the oh-so-perfect Sandra Dee Marley. Speaking of Jake and Marley, she invites him to a “Julie Andrews” movie marathon (I couldn’t make this shit up) and it’s apparently he’s growing a bit tired of little miss boring, and of course up walks “new” Santana asking for Jake’s help choreographing a Cheerio’s number, and Marley acts all cool & nonchalant about it, encouraging him to do it, because she’s trying not to be Little Miss Boring I guess (didn’t they already cover Grease on Glee last season because all I can think at this point is that Marley’s going to bust out with her rendition of “You’re the One That I Want” in black leather pants smoking a cigarette.)
Meanwhile, Sam has taken over the group of “Gagas” to create a super-freaky performance that surely will win over his “edgy” Nurse. He somehow manages to override every IT security and media device in place and during school announcements, Becky instructs the school to open their laptops and are treated to a video of Sam being really wacko-crazy instructing everyone to go to the auditorium after school.
He then personally invites weird Nurse chick, who declines because she is getting her ears pierced - -she’s THAT edgy.
While the actual Gaga’s are having a hard time coming up with a Katy Perry song to do, Jake meanders off to help “new” Santana with her choreography, which Marley witnesses your basic teenage grinding action happening, and is warned by Unique that Jake’s like 2 seconds from cheating on her.
Cut to the Lady Perry’s doing a Gaga song titled “Applause” (another song I’ve never heard) and hilarity ensues when we’re treated to Artie with some sort of inflatable bed thing behind him & his face painted white, Blaine jumps out of some sort of contraption and is sporting an indescribable outfit (so, here, I’ll just SHOW YOU:)
Ryder’s locked in a cage, Marley comes out dressed in full Katy Perry attire (she’s not going to change who she is for anyone dammit) and - the best of all is Sam looking delectably hot in this:
He looks so good, he deserves another picture:
After the performance, Mr. Schue actually SCOLDS Marley for not becoming “Gaga-esque” and SUSPENDS HER FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK from Glee Club in the episode’s biggest “WTF?” moment. Followed closely behind by the fact that after the Nurse DID make it to the performance afterall, Sam chased her down afterwards only to have her tell him she’s NOT so hardcore afterall, she’s more of a (DUN DUNNN DUNNNNNNNNNN) Katy Perry fan, to which Sam is all “ME TOO!” and they start making out. Yuck.
Back in the Glee room, the Gaga’s are still arguing over what Katy Perry song they should do, Unique informs us that she attempted to steal tigers from the zoo (thus finding out Lima has no zoo) for their performance but was unable to so she hilariously dressed Jake up like this:
…..and he’s right, he totally looks like a gay Thundercat. Tina finally instructs them that they need to lose all the “gimmicks” and strip it down and not rely on theatrics (did Katy Perry not have some outfit whereby whipped cream shot out of her boobs or something?), and they decide to do what turns out to be a beautiful ballad rendition of “Wide Awake” with nothing but a piano and them sitting on stools.
Over in New York at the diner that Rachel, Demi, Santana and now Kurt work at, Starchild has managed to track Kurt down, and they have a conversation about how able Starchild is to be “toned down” as indicated by his being dressed plain with no makeup on, and Kurt invites him to join the band which still has no name. In walks Rachel (who Kurt had previously asked to be in the band but she declined) from a Funny Girl rehearsal who out of absolutely nowhere suggests the band name “Pamela Landsbury” which Kurt ADORES exclaiming, “A band with the the raw sex appeal of Pamela Anderson and the quiet dignity of Angela Landsbury" and dear GOD someone please stab me in my eye. Rachel suddenly decides she DOES want to be in the band because as you know, starring in a Broadway musical and going to NIATA leaves her a shitload of time to dedicate to being in a band in New York.
Back in boring Jake & Marley land, he invites her to his house for what turns out to be a blue-ball inducing makeout session on his bed and a pretty "after school special” conversation about her not being “ready” and not wanting to feel “pressured” and I’m just over this whole Jake and Marley thing. (Apparently he is too because he ends up hooking up with “new” Santana later…)
Cut to the Glee room where Tina informs the group (all now dressed like Katy Perry) that the “Throat Explosions” will be performing “Applause” at Nationals (again, no idea) and Mr. Schue tries to inspire them when Sue Sylvester busts in and suspends the entire Glee club for the week for being dressed like they are. Mr. Schue and Sue go head to head about Sue’s constant beratement of the Glee Club, and the Glee club immediately bust out with a performance of “Roar” which suddenly transports us to the auditorium, with a set that indicates they have one hell of a budget, dressed to the nines in their best “Tarzan-esque” outfits.
The performance was fun and kooky and very entertaining (come on - Artie swinging from the vine on his wheelchair? Awesome.)
Over in New York we get treated to “Pamela Landsbury” also performing “Roar” but without all the theatrics and multiplying the talent like 10-fold…………
….and the show ends with both Marley and “new” Santana waving at Jake on stage.
If I never hear both the words “Gaga” or “Katy Perry” or any songs by either of them again it will be too soon.
Have a tutti fuckin frutti day,